Thursday, December 31, 2009

Remember

This was Stinky. She was with us little over 14 yrs. She was my baby before I had K. I didn't give her as much attention and devotion after K's arrival. She was a gentle, well disciplined, and very smart dog. She and K had an understood love. Neither one was crowded or antagonized each other. They didn't play together but they often sat next to each other. She was protective of him and he cared about her often asking if she was ok. K often said "mama, she is a good girl. She is my Chihuahua." They respected each other role and co-existed peacefully and lovingly. Stinky passed away on 12/29/2009.

She often hung out with us when K and I were playing and followed us throughout the house because she didn't want to be left out. She got so excited every time Joe came home from work because she knew that she would get more attention and kisses from him. I wish I was home the last few days of her life. She got really sick few months back. She was diagnosed of rapid heart murmur and possibly heart failure due to her age. We gave her medication and hope that we could keep her at least another year or so. For the past 12 yrs, Stinky kept me company ... I had something to look forward to when I came home from work when Joe was away. She was my baby in any sense of the word. She was spoiled and she deserved it. We used to sneak her into hotels...she was so quiet that no one knew she was with us. She was a runt (weighed about 3+ pounds, a mix of long and short hair Chihuahua); she was apprehensive of people more than they laughed at her because of her size. She knew me as mommy.

I said goodbye and asked her for forgiveness as soon as I got home from visiting my relatives. I told her that I wish I had been a better mommy to her last couple of years ... be more attentive and loving. And that I wished I had been home spending the last few days with her before she passed. I know that she is no longer suffering the pain ... she is healthy and sleeping on the clouds looking up to Heaven waiting her turn entering the Golden Gate. She brought joy, unconditional love, compassion, and more happiness to our life. I will see her again when my time comes. I just hope then that she remembers me as her mommy and let me hold her again, carressing her and letting her know that I always loved her and never forget her.

I will never find another dog like Stinky and I don't want to. She is special and will never be replaced. She is forever in my heart. Until next blog. My best always, Serene

Cold Day

Breezy, little cloudy (the sun is trying to come out and play), cold for PCB weather. It's ok and I would not have it any other way.

My life is what I make of it. I am a driver and navigator of my journey. But, there are times that I wish I have better foresights...we all need higher help some times...

I like where I live. I like my neighbors and surrounding. I feel safe here for my son and husband. I've lived in 6 other states...PCB is the best thus far.

Sipping on my coffee, my son is watching Sponge Bob Square Pants. One of his favorite cartoon. Joe is tidying up K's toys. Today is New Years' Eve. Too busy being a full-time mom that time passes me by. It's not like I can take sometimes off from work like I used to (I looked forward to 3 days holidays weekend and big holidays so I can take leave and to go visit my family or just hung out at home relaxing) I work 24/7 and next thing I know is that the year end has approaching. Until next blog. My best always, Serene